Kurashiki, Japan

The House that Insanity Built

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KilljoyBob
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Location: The Hostess Fruit Pie Bakery

Wed Jan 03, 2018 1:56 pm

KilljoyBob goes to comfort the toddler.

Shhh, shhh. It's not an ogre. It's just a mystical sword imbued with the soul of a dead armored guardian who has apparently taken up singing...you know what? It's a magic radio. Yep. A magic radio.
:devil: MY JUSTICE TASTES LIKE APPLES!
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Zebra-12
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Wed Jan 03, 2018 2:09 pm

In one smooth motion, Zebra-12 grabs Ryokuro by the shoulder and pulls him out of the room, while his other hand draws his pistol to protect the Emperor.

I'm all for believing in mystical singing swords, but are we sure it's not being pumped in by speaker? Someone may be screwing with us. Can any of you scan for electrical current?
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Revil Fox
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Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:59 pm

Ryokuro wrote:
Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:43 am
Ryokuro is justifiably startled and turns to look at the crew behind him as glitter starts raining down from the ceiling.

I think we are way, way past "rational"...

The voice booms out a different set of lyrics as Ryokuro is covered in pink glitter.

Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?
Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don't care?
Ohh, P!nk! I think he's on shuffle, guys, and I for one love the mix.
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Ryokuro
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Wed Jan 03, 2018 7:05 pm

Ryokuro suddenly finds himself outside, and as puzzled as he is by the larger events unfolding, his brain still takes a moment to wonder how a zebra has hands. But this flashes through his mind for just a second before an arc of electricity shoots from the room and zaps Zebra-12 as the voice howls in falsetto:

Danger! Danger! High voltage!
When we touch! When we kiss!
Beware, beware the Daughter of the Sea...
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Zebra-12
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Wed Jan 03, 2018 7:57 pm

AHHH! SONUVABITCH!

Zebra-12 falls to the floor and twiches.
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KilljoyBob
Colonel Sanders Understudy
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Location: The Hostess Fruit Pie Bakery

Wed Jan 03, 2018 8:17 pm

Oh shit!

KilljoyBob instinctively protects the toddler with his own body, then realizes what he just said in front of a kid.

I, uh, mean...oh dang.
:devil: MY JUSTICE TASTES LIKE APPLES!
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Ryokuro
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Wed Jan 03, 2018 8:39 pm

Ryokuro and Viridia grab Zebra-12 by one of his ammo belts and hauls him back over the threshold.

While I appreciate the assist, Z-12, it seems our musical friend here did not.

Baby come back, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you


...right.
Beware, beware the Daughter of the Sea...
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KilljoyBob
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Location: The Hostess Fruit Pie Bakery

Wed Jan 03, 2018 11:52 pm

I recognize that song.

...but that's not really important right now.
:devil: MY JUSTICE TASTES LIKE APPLES!
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Ogre_Minstrel
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 12:14 am

Toddler: Wadio? WADIO?!?


Curious, Toddler creeps closer, intermittently moving his diapered booty in time with the music
Signatures. How quaint.
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KilljoyBob
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 1:50 am

Aw, come on, kid. I'm trying to keep you alive.

KilljoyBob tries to pull the wiggly toddler back to safety.
:devil: MY JUSTICE TASTES LIKE APPLES!
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Chaomancer Omega
We Went There
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 5:04 am

OK, OK... let's think here. The bolt was either to prevent Ryo and Zebra from leaving -- just one of them, or any of us? -- or was due to direct contact between them -- probably not, since KJB and the Toddler aren't getting fried. Or was completely capricious, which I am not willing to rule out.

To answer Zebra's pre-fricassee question, I can't detect electrical currents, but I might theoretically be able to generate a small EMP. But I'm not comfortable with doing that just off the cuff, given that it may cause more problems, and you're already twitching on the floor.
Sometimes I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast. Often my breakfast itself encompasses four of them.
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Zebra-12
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 12:32 pm

Thanks.

Zebra-12 winces and groans, but manages to push himself up into a sitting position.

I'd rather not get hit with a jolt like that again.
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KilljoyBob
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 12:50 pm

My guess is this: Stove, like so many of the old Halls guardians, seemed to have a connection with Slovman back in the day. When Ryokuro touched the table, which I think we're all assuming holds the sword, it awoke that connection. Why it responds like a party at Ru Paul's house, I have no idea. But Zebra-12 broke that connection, so it lashed out at him.

Either that, or it was responding to him pulling his gun. Just to be safe...

KilljoyBob puts the Fruit Pie he's holding back into his pounch.
:devil: MY JUSTICE TASTES LIKE APPLES!
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Revil Fox
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 5:11 pm

*mutters under his breath* I did warn you guys about the weapon thing...
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Ogre_Minstrel
Licked the Moon
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Thu Jan 04, 2018 7:38 pm

Toddler looks at Revil, laughs gleefully, and claps his pudgy little hands

WADIO! WADIO! WEAPONS! WADIO! SHITFUCK! WADIO!
Signatures. How quaint.
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